Baby Phelps

As with many new dads, I want to start teaching my son how to play various sports as soon as possible.  My wife loves the beach and sitting around swimming pools so it is understandable that she wants to teach Baby Carter how to swim as an infant.  Although I am anxious to start the sports development process, I am very hesitant about putting my son into a disgusting public swimming pool.  I also do not think 6-months is old enough for an infant to learn such a critical life skill.  To give my wife the benefit of the doubt, I decided to do a little research regarding infants learning how to swim and found some very helpful articles.

Circleofmoms.com had a few informative articles, which included the following factoids:

“You should not bring your baby to a public pool until they have had all of their immunizations.”

“Infants can begin the swim process as young as 4-6 months.  At this age, babies are less fearful of water and floating in the water may still feel instinctual to them.”

“Generally, children under 4 years of age are not developmentally ready for swimming lessons (strokes, holding breath, etc.), thus aquatic programs for children less than 4 years have not proven to decrease the risk of drowning.”

Worldwideswimschool.com also included the following helpful bullets:

“The water is a perfect medium to stimulate babies.  It can become a place of fun, enjoyment, and learning.”

“Before you take you baby into the aquatic environment, they should have good neck control and the parent(s) should be confortable handling their child.”

“Crawling is a very similar action that babies can use to propel themselves through water.”

“Children who participate in early swimming programs are more intelligent, socially adventurous, better coordinated, and had greater self esteem.”

I do feel somewhat better about starting Baby Carter in an infant swim program, but I am not sure if he is ready to take on such a courageous task.  I think some of my fears and concerns derive from my personal fears of drowning when I was younger.  I do not want Baby Carter to develop the same fears as his dad, but I also do not want to put my best little bud in such a compromising situation.  My wife seems to be completely comfortable with the situation so maybe I am overreacting?  I welcome any suggestions or insights.  In the meantime, lets look at a couple funny baby-swimming pictures!

Raspberries and Bubbles: The New Foreign Language

Blowing bubbles and raspberries seems to be Baby Carter’s new form of entertainment.  He starts by looking directly at you with large hazel eyes (takes after his daddy) and a playful grin from ear to ear with a slight giggle followed by a slew of jumbled vowel sounds (baby talk).  Just for fun, I respond with a smile and a slew of vowel sounds of my own in an effort to answer in his new language.  My voice is very deep so Baby Carter stops his fanatic arm flares and leg kicks, and he stares at me with a slight look of confusion.  I then pause and stare back at him waiting for a response.  We are now in the middle of a staring contest to see who will break first.  Suddenly, the silence is broken by a loud and wet raspberry sound similar to that of a “fart” noise commonly created by immature dads in a crowded elevator.  The raspberries are quickly followed by multiple small oblong bubbles that soak his upper and bottom lips, which eventually runs down his chin and eventually comes to rest on his chest.  I try to keep my bearing but it is just so damn cute and funny I have no choice but to break down and laugh-which makes him laugh.  Through this fun interaction I failed to realize that we are in fact communicating.

According to fitpregnancy.com, raspberries and bubbles are an infants “first forms of communication.”  When a child experiments with his mouth, it is an early sign of speech development.  Another form of communication often found in infants is the tongue game where they stick out their tongue in an effort to gain your attention.  I was concerned that Baby Carter had picked up some early bad habits but in fact he is attempting to communicate with me.  I love the raspberry and bubbles game but I wish I had purchased more burp cloths because Baby Carter is setting a new world record as a human bubble machine!

"Watch Me Grow" Photos

It has been almost 4 months since my last post and for the few that enjoy my previous posts I apologize for the delay.  A lot has happened in the last 4 months to include many lessons learned as a tired new dad.  One of those lessons learned is the importance of documenting baby Carter’s growth and development in the form of monthly “Watch Me Grow” pictures.  My wife is a very creative and determined woman with a large amount of patience.  Every month on baby Carter’s anniversary, she would pose him with a stuffed Pooh Bear in my favorite leather “man-chair” and send it out to family and friends with a “Watch Me Grow” caption.  The key to “Watch Me Grow” pictures is to utilize the same props (i.e. stuffed animal or toy) and background if possible.  The most challenging part of taking pictures of an infant is keeping him focused long enough to get a good picture.  Once you start your “Watch Me Grow” collection, every month is full of anticipation to see how much growth has occurred.  When you see your baby every day, it is hard to see the growth and development.  However, when you compare each month’s photo with previous photos, it is incredible to see the results.  I highly recommend “Watch Me Grow” photos and the sooner you start the better!

Baby Carter 2 Weeks

Baby Carter 1 Month

Baby Carter 2 Months

Baby Carter 3 Months

Baby Carter 4 Months

Baby Carter 5 Months

Baby Carter 6 Months

Protective Posse

One of our biggest concerns of having a baby were our two dogs, Lenox and Haven.  Lenox is a lhasapoo and Haven is a cockapoo.  They are both very loving and protective dogs but they were never fond of kids.  My wife and I read many books and articles about how to prepare dogs for a new baby but the thought of something bad happening was always a concern.  For the first few days we let them smell Baby Carter's blankets, clothes, toys, etc. so that they would be familiar with the scent.  We then slowly started to let Lenox and Haven come up to Baby Carter while we were holding him.  Surprisingly, Lenox acted as if Carter didn't exist and Haven wanted to lick his face off!  My biggest concern was our bedroom.  Lenox and Haven sleep in the room with us so putting Baby Carter in the same room could upset them.  Fortunately, one month prior to Baby Carter's arrival, my wife and I spent every night teaching them to go to their beds on the floor (rather than in our bed with us).  They caught on quickly and by week 2, they preferred to be in their own beds on the floor.  Once Baby Carter was introduced to the bedroom scene their actions completely surprised me.  Within days, Haven would go over to Baby Carter whenever he made a noise to check to see if he was okay.  He would give him a little sniff and a lick on the head then walk right back to his bed to curl up and all back asleep.  Lenox too, began to accept Baby Carter as a member of the pack and he started to show signs of protection (as with most lhasapoos).  It is now common to find Lenox lying next to Baby Carter's NapNanny and/or Boppy pillow.  I have not and will not drop my guard and leave Baby Carter unattended with the dogs, but I can say with a high level of confidence that Lenox and Haven are Baby Carter's new "Protective Posse."

(Haven)

(Lenox)

Blowouts

It has been almost 2 weeks since my last post so I decided to get caught up with a great topic; "blowouts."  Blowouts is the term used when a baby relieves himself and the "o-rings"(or sides of the diaper) can no longer hold the oozing putty from within.  Baby Carter manages to have about 3-4 blowouts a week, mostly after his mid-day feeding.  There are parents who believe that you can prevent blowouts from occurring by changing a baby's diaper every hour but I am here to tell you that is absolutely crap! (no pun intended).  I can list three occasions in the past week where Baby Carter had on a fresh and dry diaper, and all of a sudden my pants look like I spilled a bottle of yellow mustard all over them.  I know I wan't eating hotdogs or brats so it definitely was not mustard!  In any case, blowouts are a great excuse for giving Baby Carter a nice clean bath and it is acceptable to treat yourself to a new wardrobe as well.  Baby Carter continues to defy the laws of physics and I look forward to what future lessons await!

Kids and Technology Article

This article was passed on to me from one of my fellow UMass MEd classmates.  I am not sure as to how accurate the survey was but claiming that 81% of all children have an online presence by the time they are age two seemed high.  Additionally, the article claimed that "high tech devices should unequivocally not be used as babysitters, but practicality being what it is, sometimes you have to bow to reality."  So Nickelodeon and Disney Channel are not good alternatives for babysitters?  I hope you enjoy this read.

Kids and Technology: Parenting Tips

Can Infants Smell Food?

It seems that every time my wife and I attempt to eat a meal together, Baby Carter decides that he must be a part of the festivities.  It doesn't matter if he just fed or not; he always cries (even from a deep sleep) when we are preparing to eat.  I don't think infants can distinguish smells like children can, (but I am no expert) so I did some research online and found an interesting article about infants and their sense of smell.  According to the article, infants can sense amniotic fluid minutes after birth and some can go as far as distinguishing the difference between breast milk and formula within 12 hours of birth.  Additionally, the more skin on skin contact a baby has with his/her mother, the more likely they will to recognize via smell when she is in the vicinity.  The article can be found at http://www.parentingscience.com/newborn-senses.html. 

Unfortunately, it was difficult to locate any tangible articles regarding an infant’s ability to distinguish food smells in the house.  I didn’t think it was possible for Baby Carter to smell us cooking dinner but he always manages to wake up as we sit down to eat.  It is hard to enjoy a nice meal with a screaming baby serenading us at the dinner table.  I did, however, find an article about an infant’s ability to taste.  Apparently, infants can taste four of the five major tastes: sweetness, bitterness, sourness, and umami.  Infants cannot taste saltiness until they are about 4 months old.  So if an infant can sense four of the five major tastes, should he have the ability to sense food smells?  Many of the blogs I found on this topic provided no scientific evidence that infants react to food smells but I did find many parents that are convinced their babies get hungry when they are cooking certain foods.  I am convinced that in Baby Carter’s case; he is hungry all the time and he gets upset when he does not sense mommy close by.  Maybe someone with more experience or knowledge can offer some helpful insight on this topic?

Red Sox or Yankees Update

Since my wife (huge Red Sox fan) and I (huge Yankees fan) cannot agree on what team Baby Carter should follow, we have decided to let Baby Carter be a Minnesota Twins fan.  We are fortunate enough to have a cousin pitch for the Twins this season so we will be sporting #56 jerseys until he is traded or he decides to retire.  Let's go Terry Doyle!  Baby Carter is your biggest fan!

First Visit From My Mother-In-Law

This past week marked the first of many visits from my mother-in-law and I have to admit it was an overall enjoyable visit.  She allowed my wife and I to be in charge as new mom and dad.  I was shocked!  By no means is my mother-in-law an overbearing "do it my way or the highway" type, but I expected some friction as with many mother-in-law/new dad relationships.  She was very helpful around the house and I know my wife appreciated the breaks between feedings while Nan (that's what she wants to be called instead of grandma) entertained Baby Carter.  If I had one complaint, it would be to let Baby Carter have a moment to himself.  I came home from work and Nan would be holding Baby Carter.  I came home from umpiring a baseball game and Nan would be holding Baby Carter.  I came home from the gym and (Yup you got it!) Nan would be holding Baby Carter.  Nan time with Baby Carter may have been a little excessive, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that this is her first grandchild.  Furthermore, it is the first infant she has held and cared for in 23 years.  Nevertheless, I am convinced that Baby Carter enjoyed every moment with her.  My mother-in-law and I may not agree on everything but she cares about us and Baby Carter and she would do anything for him.  For this, I am grateful to her and I hope we can continue to work through our differences and give Baby Carter the happy and healthy family he deserves.

I try to make a point with every blog post I write so I guess the point of this one is for the new dad's out there to give their mother-in-laws a chance.  Although you may not see "eye-to-eye" with them, give them a chance to show you that they want nothing more than to be a part of you and your new baby's life.  Thanks for your help this week Nan!

Albany, NY Photos

Cool Photos, a gallery on Flickr.

I came across these beautiful pictures of our future home, Albany, NY. I can't wait for my first NY snow storm!

Hand Sanitizer, Chernobyl & Conjunctivitis

Is it normal to want to wear a full body Nuclear Biological Chemical (NBC) protective suit every time I walk into the pediatrician's office?  We visited the pediatrician's office a few days ago and everywhere I looked there were sick children coughing without covering their mouths, vomiting all over themselves and their parents, scratching visible rashes and others visibly sick with some form of virus or bacteria.  Our pediatrician's office is very large with a staff of at least 7-8 doctors and 20 or so nurses.  They were all running around like ants in an ant hill trying to keep up with the charts, children and phone calls.  I must have squirted hand sanitizer into my hands 10 times in a 30 minute period (yes, that is once every 3 minutes!).  I felt the urge to rub the hand sanitizer all over my body but the bottle was almost empty.  I guess an empty bottle of hand sanitizer is par for a pediatrician's office?  What I don't understand is why when you call the pediatrician's help line about a possible issue with your baby, they always seem to want to see your child as soon as possible.  Walking a potentially sick baby into a pediatrician's office is like walking through Chernobyl completely naked.  Nevertheless, this past week marked another pivotal day in the life of Baby Carter as he was diagnosed with his first infection; Conjunctivitis (Pink Eye).  Apparently, infants can contract Conjunctivitis from their tear ducts not being fully opened (formed).  The ironic part of treating Conjunctivitis was the medication made Baby Carter's eyes look more gooey and unpleasant than before the treatment.  I guess the prescribed medication is better for Baby Carter than dad's solution of more hand sanitizer!

Here is some more good information I found about Conjunctivitis for those who are interested. 

Conjunctivitis (CDC)

What Is Day Care Worth?

This has been a very busy week.  I had to return to work after a fun yet sleepless 10 days of paternity leave.  I have to admit, I never thought I would miss Baby Carter's sweet cries for attention or the dangerous yet impressive diaper changing missions, but something about not holding mini-me made me miss him like crazy.  My wife plans to return to work in 4 weeks which would require day care for Baby Carter.  As a military family, we rate the benefit of on-base day care but the waiting list for infants is 8-12 months.  Our  second option is a family friend that we trust who also has her own infant to care for.  Are two infants too much for a young mom to handle?  I have met many parents with twins and triplets so I assume a strong mom can handle caring for multiple infants.  Furthermore, how much do we ask a family friend to watch Baby Carter?  The base child care program has very reasonable prices but to offer a friend a similar contract may offend her.  On the other hand, if she requests a price north of reasonable, it may not be worth the trouble or money to have my wife return to work.  Additionally, if my wife does not return to work, she can spend more quality mommy-baby time with Baby Carer.  Does anyone have any pointers to add to this discussion?

Daycare Costs: Is Working Worth It?

Bad Parenting?

I almost forgot to post this story.  Earlier in the week, my wife and I brought Baby Carter to the pediatrician for a scheduled check-up.  This was my first trip to a pediatrician office since I was a young boy.  As soon as we walked in, I immediately noticed not one but two waiting rooms; one labeled "sick" kids and one for "well" kids.  Makes sense I guess. Nevertheless, we headed into the "well" room since Disney's Madagascar was playing on the flat screen television.  My wife, Baby Carter, and I sat on the very far end of the room hoping to keep the other families from waking the rarely sleeping Baby Carter.  At some point, a woman and her 5-6 year old daughter came into the waiting room and sat down across from us.  The little burnet-haired well-spoken girl was playing with a few of the waiting room toys and puzzles when her mother caught her peeking up at Madagascar on the television.  The scene was a very catchy song and dance that would grab most kids attention (to include mine).

The mother snapped at her daughter, "Do not look at that television!"

My wife and I looked at each other in awe.  I whispered to my wife, "Wow, so is that considered good parenting-not allowing your kid to watch television?  If so, we might be in trouble! We attended some great colleges and hold multiple graduate level degrees and I watched a ton of television as a child!  She can't be for real!"

About 5 minutes later, the little girl became bored of the toys and puzzles so the mother broke out a homemade "opposites" game where she makes a statement and the answer is the opposite of that statement.

The first riddle was "The sun is to day as the moon is to _____?"

The girl enthusiastically answered "NIGHT!"

The mother continued with "When you throw the ball up, then it must come ____?"

The little girl hesitated a moment and answered "When you throw the ball up...?"

The mother repeated the riddle two more times before the little girl's lightbulb went off.  "IT MUST COME DOWN!"

The little girl was so excited about finally getting the answer correct she continued with "Wow, mommy! I am so smart aren't I?!"

I will never forget the mother's response to her beautiful and bright young daughter, "I don't know about that, it took you way too long to get that one!"

The little girl lowered her head in defeat just as they were called into the doctors office.  The sad part was she was completely serious!  Are you kidding me!  Her daughter just asked her for some motherly love and reassurance and she completely shut her down!  I am new to the whole parenting thing, but I know she was way out of line to discredit her daughter like that!  If the latest edition of Parenting magazine my wife was browsing was within arms reach, I probably would have thrown it at the back of the mother's head!  Will someone please let me know if they agree with this parenting style?  If so, you are in serious need of love and affection!

ESA or 529 College Savings Plan?

It is no secret that college expenses can exceed $20K a year for state schools and double to $40K+ for private schools which is why it is important to start planning for Baby Carter's future as soon as possible.  I would not change my childhood for anything, but my family worked hard to live paycheck to paycheck with no money left over for college.  As a service member, I lucked out and was able to make a dent in my college expenses with G.I. Bill benefits.  Nevertheless, I hold multiple degrees and learned the hard way that college debt can sneak up on a student if not closely monitored.  With current monthly college loan payments that mirror a mortgage payment, I will be paying off college loans until Baby Carter begins college!  I want Baby Carter to have every opportunity to attend a great school and not have to worry about participating in random pharmaceutical lab projects to pay for tuition or have to be forced to take out a mortgage to earn a reputable degree.  Additionally, as much as I would love to have Baby Carter grow up to be a Marine, it is hard to plan for military educational benefits in his case.  This is why starting a savings plan as soon as possible is critical to his financial future.  I will be the first to admit that I am personally, professionally (and as soon as I finish my EdD) educationally satisfied with my life, but I do not have the financial stability to write a check for his tuition outright.  After some brief research, I found two popular college savings programs that may interest parents.  An Educational Savings Account (ESA) or Education IRA is a non-deductible tax-free savings account that parents can contribute up to $2K a year with no limits as to how the money is invested.  A 529 College Savings Plan is a tax advantaged savings plan that is opened in your state, another state, or directly with the university of choice.

As a military family, it is difficult to choose a state to pay into a 529 plan.  This is where an ESA can be more beneficial.  Unfortunately, the yearly investment cap of an ESA is $2K.  If anyone has any other great college savings plan ideas I am more than open for recommendations.  

The link below is a great reference to the advantages and disadvantages of the ESA and 529 savings plans. The link goes into greater detail than my post.

ESAs Vs. 529 College Savings Plans

Battle of Wills (and Socks)

Today marked another important day of the long war.  The Battle of Wills began with the relentless cries for attention from Baby Carter after his mid-day feeding.  I laid him down in his bassinet and within minutes he sent forward the first of many frontal attacks.  At first, the attack was a bit scattered and indirect but as he gained ground, the attack intensified.  Within 8-10 minutes my defenses were breached and I had no choice but to hold up the white flag (yet again).  I picked Baby Carter up out of his bassinet and held him up to my chest with his head facing his mommy.  It only took about 10 seconds for him to call off the attack.  He then went as far as to throw in a little "Ha, I win again!" smile to his mommy.  In an effort to rebuild my defenses before the next attack, I spoke to a friend about how long the Battle of Wills can last and he simply stated "it depends."  One of his daughters used to cry for attention for 15-20 minutes before falling asleep and the other took over an hour at times before she gave up.  OVER AN HOUR!?  There is no way I can listen to my future Yankee pitcher cry for 10 minutes, nevermind an hour without a breakdown in my willpower!  And for those who are keeping track, yes, I am 0 for 3 in the war thus far.

Score:  Baby Carter-3     Daddy-0

Socks:  Another battle I cannot manage to keep up with is the Battle of the Socks.  Baby Carter manages to take of his socks no matter how many times I put them back on his tiny feet.  I concluded that he is not strong enough or long enough to grab his feet so they miraculously just disappear.  At one point, I found a sock upstairs and its evil twin brother was downstairs on the opposite side of the house!  Maybe Baby Carter has a career in magic!  Stand back David Blaine!

A Little Overprotective?

So is this an example of good parenting or bad parenting?  Maybe parents just want their babies to get a head start on playing football.

Must Have Items

Most dads do not have much to say when it comes to picking out baby clothes and other useful baby items so they just go with the flow when presented with "how about this item?" scenarios from their significant other.  Nevertheless, I have to give credit where credit's due.  Two must have items that have been life savers for me include the Playtex(R) Diaper Genie Elite and the Nap Nanny Chill(TM).  The Diaper Genie is a convenient, clean and organized (this is critical for people suffering with OCD) way of disposing dirty diapers twice a week rather than everyday.  The Nap Nanny is a soft, comfortable, and reclined alternative to a bassinet.  Baby Carter is not a fan of lying flat on his back (as with many new borns from what I read), so the Nap Nanny is a great alternative if you believe sleep is underrated.  The first night we put him in the Nap Nanny, he slept for most of the night (with exception to feeding time).  Although I have not completely given up on the bassinet, I may have to put in the attic for now.  But word of caution about the Nap Nanny-NEVER PUT IT IN A CRIB OR ON ANY ELEVATED POSITION!

playtexbaby.com

www.napnanny.com

Perfect Timing

This next story happened 3 times already so hopefully someone can learn from my mistakes.  Baby Carter has quickly evolved into an assembly line of dirty diapers.  If I could only find a way to harvest his dirty diapers into something more useful than a "Sh!& snake" (from Diaper Genie and I highly recommend this as a must purchase for any new dad) I would be inclined to fight for a spot on the show "Shark Tank".  Nevertheless, no bankers or investors are lining up to invest in "Carter Dirt" so his impressive diaper art will go to waste for now.  I digress...back to the story at hand.

So the past few days, I have been doing everything I can to calm my OCD (just short of carrying Carter in one arm and a Dustbuster in another) and thought a set process would help Baby Carter and me adapt to the new lifestyle.  The typical schedule I attempted to follow included changing his diaper immediately after every time he woke up from a nap.  The post nap changes went without issue but not 2 minutes later, while holding him in my arm, (with my hand near his bottom area) the bomb went off.  Carter would fuss a little and then the calm before the storm.  A category 2 earthquake would shake my hand from his bottom area.  You have to be kidding me!  Not two minutes after changing him, he would thank me by creating dirty art work followed by a huge smile of gratification.

Lesson Learned:  Let baby awaken for a few minutes before rushing to change his post nap diaper because he may have more baby paint to throw on his art canvas.

Are You Okay?!

Since I got back from the hospital with Baby Carter, I have noticed that my senses are heavily focused on every finger twitch, head roll, leg kick, sucking noise, or any other movement or sound that originates from his direction.  Earlier today, I fell asleep while he was sleeping in his swing and he sneezed.  It was the most adorable sneeze-similar to that of a puppy-but my mind processed it as if a glass fell off the counter and broke into a million pieces.  I immediately jumped off of the couch and crawled over to him to make sure he was okay.  Most of my friends have children and they warned me about the overprotective stage.  One thing they failed to mention was how long the stage lasts.  Will I always be so reactive to his every move?

Decision Points

Decision Points is a section dedicated to posts regarding difficult decision points a new father is presented with throughout the fatherhood journey.  Any and all recommendations are welcome.

Decision Point #1:  Mommy is a huge Red Sox fan and daddy is a huge Yankees fan.  Although he has many Red Sox and Yankees apparel themed baby outfits, only one team will stick with him until he is old enough to make is own decisions. 

So...Yankees or Red Sox?

"I Told You So!"

"I told you so!" is a new section dedicated to fatherly lessons learned the hard way.  Every time I disregard parental recommendations from my dad, in-laws, family, friends, etc. that end up just as they predicted, I will post them here.

I Told You So #1:  

Scenario:  It was about 3:00am and baby Carter was fussing.  I carried him over to the changing table and unsnapped his onesie to expose his dirty diaper.  I opened his diaper and witnessed a mess that a CSI tech would need to seek counseling for.  I proceeded to wipe him clean with the cold baby wipe and before I could finish, I felt a warm fluid hit on my hand and run down part of my arm.  He was urinating all over me!  I attempted to grab the new diaper from one of the baskets underneath the changing table, but it was too late.  The warm flow of urine was accompanied by more crime scene fecal matter.  Awesome.  I protected what I could with the dirty wipe in my right hand and waited for the horrific event to conclude.  Once Carter completed his mission to initiate dad, he looked up at me and had the biggest smile I've seen thus far.  The little monster knew what we was doing!  He said "I Told You So!"

Recommendation:  Make sure you do not remove the dirty diaper until you have already have a clean diaper underneath the dirty diaper.  This way you can wipe the baby clean and quickly "switch" the diapers while preventing him from initiating you college fraternity style.

The Beautiful Combat Zone

Most men do not expect much from their significant other on Valentine's Day, but this year my wife gave me the best gift a man could ask for; the gift of fatherhood.  What my wife failed to mention in the lovely Hallmark Greeting card was the follow-on gift of 4 hours of sleep, 62 diaper changes, and the sweet lullabies of newborn screeching over the next 5 days.  As an active duty Marine officer, I have had many sleepless nights on duty or flying combat missions, where stress and lack of sleep are commonplace.   Furthermore, the Corps does a good job of preparing Marines for the stresses of combat to include lack of sleep, loud noises, and/or terrible smells with their "train like we fight" mentality.  No amount of training and/or preparation prepared me for this past week.  From the moment he entered this world and I became a dad, my world became a beautiful combat zone.  Quiet calmness quickly turned to loud obnoxious cries for help.  You think there would be enough ammunition to halt the enemy's advance but then the bottles go dry.  You lost count of how many cries for the "MEDIC!" go unanswered as the dirty diaper machine gun hits you from every direction.  The clock says 3:30am.  Perfect, as always, the enemy hits you at the most inopportune times.  Your calls for reinforcements also go unanswered as they are still recovering from the previous Battle of Labor.  You are confused, lost, tired, scared, alone, and out of ammunition and ideas.  You want to call "Surrender" but the Marine Corps taught you to never give up.  Just as the fog of war is at its thickest; it happened.  The loud cries for help lessened and the barrage of dirty diaper machine gun rounds stopped.  The fog slowly began to clear and before long you can make out two very bright and sparkling circles.  The circles are calming and beautiful. A sense of gratification and love starts to overwhelm the previous feelings of fear, anxiety, and confusion.  The circles get brighter and  eventually they open to a beautiful 22 inch, 7 lbs, 1 oz ray of sunshine.  It is Baby Carter.  The battle has ceased for now, but the war is far from over.